That's our courtdate. It was like jumping through hopes to get it. I didn't realize it wasn't automatically assigned and have been waiting for months to get a letter notifying me of the date. I found out last week that the district we're assigned to does not automatically do that. So, it's done now. We both have to take a parenting class. Mine is Nov 20. I e-mailed D the info so he can schedule his class.
After the phone call, I had another head in my hands how is this my life moment. Surreal that I'm here.
After "skipping out" last Tues-Thurs, D IM'd me late Friday night to ask what time S's soccer game was on Saturday. I SO did not want to respond. I DID make him wait, but I told him, but geez I didn't want to. He showed up, sober, before I did. He played with Connor for the entire hour (this was a good thing!).
I had nothing to say to him, and what did come to mind was certainly not appropriate in front of S. After the babies went down for their nap, I asked if he had changed his visiting routine without telling me. "I had a bad week." That was it. I had a bad week. Wish *I* could use that excuse. I'm so done with him that I don't have the effort to fight, or even discuss. He has exhausted me, and I just don't care enough anymore. I did manage to tell him to NEVER call me his wife again. That although I was technically, he clearly doesn't give a shit about me, and I'm beginning to believe for his children either. He had no comment to that.
Later in the day, I was helping him with his phone (he is technologically illiterate). He got a new phone and had no idea where to look for texts. He actually had the volume off and so had no idea I was calling or texting. He had to answer some security questions. One was "where did your parents meet." He answered, and then said "although I don't have parents. If I did, I wouldn't be so fucked up." OMG GROW UP. You are almost 45 years old and STILL blaming your parents.
A bit later, he told me he needed more money from our joint account. We talked about that a bit. He actually said "between booze and food I'm spending about xxx a day." He LITERALLY has alcohol in his flipping BUDGET. He is OUT of money, but refuses to stop drinking even though it means he's brok. No words.
Nov 25.
I'm sitting here literally shaking my head.... He's blaming his lack of parents? Seriously? At his age? He had his mom up until not all that long ago - how can he say that his lack of parents effed him up? Ridiculous. And for him to think that if his parents were still around, he'd be less of an ass? I highly doubt that. I'm sorry, I technically don't *know* him, but he's being a complete jackass. AND he's asking your for money because he drank all of his away? It's no wonder you don't have the words to express yourself right now. I don't even think the words exist. JACKASS!
ReplyDeleteI sit here today, Oct. 15 - the 8th anniversary of when they found my sister's body - and I mourn the loss of her - I mourn for her children who are growing up without her. Then I'm reminded of D and how careless he is being with the lives of his children. He doesn't even realize how lucky he is to have them, to have the opportunity to be their father.... and he pisses it all away. I love that he played with C for that full hour, but an hour every now and then does not make him a father. I know you know all of this - I'm just venting. I just wish for one moment D could understand what it's like for my niece and nephew to grow up without their mom... see it from that perspective and maybe start giving a crap for a change. Those babies matter. This is about THEM and not him. He's so selfish it makes my head spin.
I hate that you have to deal with all of this. :-( And it is sad that he has to budget booze into his daily expenses.
ReplyDeleteI am happy for S's sake that he showed up at her game. Wish he would show up sober more often and really be a part of their lives.