Denial. Yes or No?

Just now, I heard both insight and denial within the same 5 minutes. I called D to see if I needed anything before I came home. We talked a minute, and then he says that J IM'd him on FB. J (and my bff S) are also getting a divorce. J had no idea about ours. The insight? D told him that the divorce is happening because of his drinking. Good, good. That's progress!

The denial? A few minutes later I asked him if he'd called any of the agencies I'd sent him to get an appt. He said "noooo, I'm not really sure what to say about why I'm calling. I mean, what do I need?"

Um, hahahahahaha?! Funny, right? Thankfully, I didn't laugh. I did say that he needs to call and let them know he's going through a divorce, and that him being able to see his kids is contingent on him receiving on-going therapy.

That bit of denial aside, he DOES seem to be in a better place the last two days. Before he left last night, I asked if he'd been to AA. He said no, but that he was going when he left. Obviously he didn't. Otherwise, he's been productive with work, patient with babies, etc, both yesterday and today. He mentioned his car lasting at least 10 more years. He rarely talks about the future, so it always makes me feel good when I hear things like that. THESE are the days when I get a teeny bit hopeful. This is the D that I want, that is rational/logical/HAPPY. I also know, based on past experience, that this could just be because we're seeing the lawyer on Saturday. He has a history of doing this prior to dr appts also. Like, he's trying so hard to make himself better so he has something good to report. Then, of course, Saturday night and into Sunday will probably be a fiasco.

Oh, and another funny...during the same convo as above he asked about our car insurance. I'd already told him that I got a new policy in just my name, and explained that he can keep the policy we have, just to take my name off and change his address. He said "so I paid $240 last week. That was for me and you, for what, 3 months?" "Um no, that was for us, for ONE month." He was shocked, and I said "well, that's what happens..." "That's what happens when what?" "When you have a driving record as shitty as yours!" That shut him up.

He just CANNOT connect the dots. I really wonder if some of it isn't just plain old neurological problems from drinking. If not, he's certainly the poster child for I HAVE NO INSIGHT INTO MY ILLNESS.

Remember our condo debacle? How he decided to show up unannounced and have a 1 person party? To do damage control, I had to let the tenants have the ability to break their lease as early as March 1. So, of course 24 hours AFTER D signs his apartment lease, the tenants put in their notice. It's always freaking something. Anyhoo, I say all that to say that a few weeks after they put in their notice, D and I were talking about the condo. He said "the last time I was in there, the place was a mess. The kitchen was dirty..." I just cut him off and not so politely reminded him that the LAST time he was in there is the REASON we're in this freaking predicament in the first place and he just needed to keep his mouth shut about it. I mean, really, who in their right mind would even bring that up?!?